Wednesday, August 4, 2010

How I met my husband: my version vs his.

My husband and I celebrated our seventh wedding anniversary recently. Seven years! Where does the time go? It seems like the time from when we were having lunch in the cafeteria of our college dorm to picking out a diamond engagement ring to having a house and two kids has all gone by in the blink of an eye.

But even after all of the years that we've been together (seven years of marriage plus five of being together before that) there is something that we have never agreed on: If you ask my husband or I how we met, we have different answers. We have had this discussion with friends and they just sort of shrug their shoulders, so it's time to take it to the experts - the internet. Okay folks, who's right?

Here's the story:
My husband and I lived in the same dorm our freshman and sophomore years of college, one that worked to bring a community feeling to an otherwise massive-sized university. Along with groups to join and outings that they planned, there were athletic teams formed to play intramural sports once a week. Both my husband and I had played volleyball in high school, so we ended up signing up to play on the team (there were around eight of us in total) and therefore, according to me, met because we played together on the same volleyball team.

At the time (freshman year), we were both still dating significant others from high school, so we were nothing more than teammates that would occasionally say hi when we passed in the hallway. But by sophomore year those old relationships had each ended (thank goodness). So when we both showed up at the same party one night, I approached him, we starting talking and the rest is history.

So where is the debate? It's that my husband agrees that we were on the same volleyball team but he claims that due to the fact that we were just loose acquaintances, that doesn't count as meeting. He says that we didn't technically meet until the party the following year and he was actually able to remember my name (which, to be honest, is hard for a lot of people. It's the whole X thing that throws them off).

My counter-argument is that the reason I approached him at the party was because I already knew him, meaning we had previously met. To which he counters back that if he didn't remember my name, it doesn't count as having met.

After 12 years of being together, it's time to put an end to the debate. Which one of us is right?

Also, how did you and your significant other meet?

(I was compensated by Abazias.com for this post, but please, I need some outside opinions. Even if you agree with my husband, tell me who's right!)

27 comments:

Robyn said...

Sorry, Mr. Thanks Mail Carrier, but Xenia wins this one in my book. Perhaps if you had only had a class together and had never spoken his version would be more accurate, but you played on a TEAM together for what I am assuming was a prolonged period of time. Sure, the relationship was far from a friendship at this point, but you still "knew" each other. You had interacted, probably even high-fived! Regardless of whether or not he could remember your name, he had definitely officially MET you before the par-tay.

Maybe this is one of those classic cases demonstrating the different ways men and women think...I'd be curious to get some male opinions on the subject...

Anonymous said...

Yep you met playing volleyball so that is how you met. Just because he didn't know your name and all that doesn't matter....you still "knew" each other. I moved to my husbands school district when I was 13, and he approached me. So this is when we met and we both agree on this. Now if we were like your husband we would say 3 years later is when we really got to know each other, and talk a lot but we say 13 is when we met. It's crazy. My husband and I have known each other for 17 years!!! This post of mine is coming soon for our 9 year wedding anniversary. Happy 7 years to both of you:)

SERENA said...

I'd have to go with your version of the story, Xenia! Of course you met because you were on the same volleyball team! Just because men don't pay enough attention to "details", it doesn't mean they don't exist! lol

My boyfriend and I also have different versions of our most important moments. I guess it's bound to happen, right?
We met because he moved into the flatshare I was living in, back in London. In the beginning, I hated him. But then he started being nice to me, so.... ;)

Molly said...

You met playing volleyball!!!

I met my hubs in college too, we lived in the same dorm, but were introduced on line at the movies (not on the internet, which I've had to explain to certain people who are much younger than me).

Happy Anniversary!

Unknown said...

YOU are corrct!

I met my husband at a bar on an army post.
We've been together now for 21 years. The time seems like it has flown for us too.

Tracy said...

Happy Anniversary and many more to celebrate!

You are right, you met playing Volleyball and your relationship blossomed at the party!

Letherton said...

If you were on a team together you met your freshman year when you played volleyball.

Happy Anniversary :)

MIG said...

Okay, if you at least said hello to each other at volleyball, then that's when you met. And at the party is when your romantic relationship began. Hope your husband still likes me when he meets me this weekend. Ha, ha, ha!

At least he didn't stalk you in the parking lot the first day at a new job. Lol! He calls it stalking. I call it waiting.

How do you actually pronounce your name? I've been so scared to say it wrong in person. My husband told me just to ask you. Logical, right? Is it pronounced Zeen-ya? Just a guess. :P

Unknown said...

Well I won't be much help because I say you both can have your versions. You remember him from volleyball so to you that's when you met but It sounds like you really didn't catch his eye til the party so I say you are both right. see I said I wouldn't help. :-D I met my husband through a friend. I was sitting on our duplex stoop when he showed up to go to her house and it was smitten at first sight. :-)

Colleen (Shibley Smiles) said...

I would say as long as you exchanged words and "knew" each other on the volley ball team then that is when you met. Now if you were on the team and never spoke to each other I would go with the party.

I met my husband at work, had a friend of mine approach him about going to an amusement park with us. He couldn't but later he approached my friend about going out to a bar one night. She didn't let on to me how it transpired until the night I was getting ready LOL.

dannyscotland said...

I would define meeting as coming into contact in a social scene, regardless of whether or not you remember the name, or ever learned it in the first place. You and your husband met at volleyball, you became acquaintances at the party.

HiHoRosie said...

Sorry to your hubs but you're right. Not just because you're the author of this blog either. :) I'm sure my husband would agree with me and vote for you too. Interesting argument though - funny.

casey aubut said...

I would say that you "met" while on the Volleyball team, since if you had not met, you would not approach a stranger! :)
Hubby and I have the same debate though. We were friends with a lot of the same people, so we knew "of" each other, but had never talked. that is one point of debate. He said we were friends, but since I had never spoken to him one on one, to me that did not count. Another point of debate- one night at a party, he started hitting on one of my firends, and according to him, I jumped in there to "claim" him by kissing him! I remember him kissing me, but whatever! :) From that night on- we were inseperable, and it is 11 years later- so I guess we both win! :)

Amo said...

Well, you win, naturally! My husband and I met at a bar - he was the bartender and I was a loyal patron at his bar. Not sure we want to tell our kids this story, but it is how we met!! We also had mutual friends!

Mary Catherine said...

You totally are correct! I am stopping over from Welcome Wednesday! I am your newest follower of your blog, twitter and I like you on facebook! I hope you will stop over :)

I met my husband on New Years Eve, and refused to kiss him at midnight (I don't kiss strangers) he likes to remind me of it all the time!

Debbie Beedge said...

My husband doesn't remember the first time we met since he was new to our dorm and doesn't remember meeting anybody that day. It still counts as the first time we met, so *zam!* You met on the volleyball team.

chantal said...

I agree with you. You knew him before the party which is what made you approach him in the first place.


I met my hubby at work/myspace we were on the same team at work but I had never noticed him. One day while checking my email on myspace he had written me said he noticed me all the time but never got the chance to talk to me. I don't think I'd ever date him I was 18 and though I wanted kids at some point right then just wasn't it sadly he had two. So I already had my guard up with him. Besides I was dating someone else at the time When I went in the hospital for seizure my then current boyfriend was nowhere to be found my soon to be hubby was the only one who called texted or anything it was astonishing to me that he went out of his way for a woman who had made it clear she wasn't interested. We talked dated and eventually became a couple we got married last feb 2009 and after four years. I'm glad he didn't give up on me.


The only thing we disagree on is. That my hubby claims we were outside of work one day and that he was right in front of me and I was too stuck up to talk back to him. I claim he wasn't because I never saw him I'm not stuck up I just never noticed him lol

Jackie said...

I'd say if there were only 8 of you on the team, that's when you met.

My husband and I met in high school (I was a Sophmore, he was a Senior). I was best friends with his sister. She told him I liked him, she told me he liked me (neither one of us had ever said anything). I guess since he figured I liked him, he called and asked me out. That was 29 years, two daughters and three dogs ago. I'm so glad he asked!

Angie Bailey said...

In my opinion you actually did technically meet on your volleyball team, whether he remembered your name or not, and shame on him for not remembering, lol. But you formally met at the party because this is actually what got you two together.

My boyfriend and I have a similar situation. He's about 7 years older than me and went to school with my brother so I was actually at his graduation, lol, but I was 12 and neither of us was interested of course. We were formally introduced by my brother about 5 years later and have been together since because by that time we both were somewhat on the same level.

LeeAnn said...

I'm on your side of the debate, Xenia. You MET when you played volleyball together.

My husband and I met when we both worked at the same company. It is actually kind of amusing. He liked a friend of mine, but she didn't like him back in that way - they were just friends. He used to always ask my opinion about what he should do as far as asking her out, etc. and the more we talked about her, the closer we got to one another. We became really good friends through those conversations and I guess one day we just decided to take it to the next level. Almost 11 years later, here we are. :-)

Mandee said...

Oh you are definitely right! It's funny how men think sometimes. I have to agree with you on this one b/c if you played volleyball together you obviously met one another. Especially since you were saying hello in the hallways and so forth. Silly hubby-you're wrong this time! he he!

My hubby and I both agree on how we met. His best friend and my best friend were dating and the minute my hubby and I saw one another we started asking our friends about each other!

Amber said...

I have to say I'm on your hubbys side. If I don't remember someone I don't count it as meeting them. I know there are people I see at parties and such all the time, I know who they are from seeing them around, but I've never actually MET them. I don't know a thing about them.

It's kind of the same thing for me and my man. He says we met way before we did. I don't count it as meeting because I didn't know who he was. I recognized him from class and we may have shared a friendly hello, but that just seemed more like common courtesy to a fellow class mate. There was no sit down and chat, no nice to meet you, get to know you or anything of the sort for nearly a year. We were just two people who shared a common course.

Tracey said...

I agree with you that you had already met. My husband and I have a similar debate. We also met in college during student gov't but he swears that I asked him out originally but I know better! LOL
Found you on FF---adding to list of blogs I read. :)
http://garciamania.blogspot.com

Aleksandra Nearing said...

Does it matter? You're together and happy :) Congrats on your anniversary!

I met my hubby online when it was the taboo thing to do - 10 years ago. We moved in together 4 months after our first date. When you know you know :)

Becca said...

Im confused, because it sounds like he agrees you two met on the volleyball team. Men are weird lol

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Sarah Coulsey said...

You win!!! That sounds like something my Hubby would say!!